Anyone who has had breast cancer will tell you they remember where they were when they got the news, but little else about what their doctor said immediately afterwards. I’m no exception. I was celebrating my 45th birthday—my kids were 10 and 12 and we’d recently moved from Maryland to Texas. There was no family nearby, and I was only just beginning to make new friends. It felt like the end of the world.

It’s been eight years since the day I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Looking back, there are a number of things I wish I’d known at the start of my journey that would have helped me to better navigate my way, especially as a mom with two young sons. Here’s a list of suggestions for other moms who are newly diagnosed or in treatment. I hope it helps you, or someone you love.

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