When I was diagnosed with breast cancer—before my double mastectomy, before chemotherapy, and even before I received the bell-ringing news that my MRI scan showed NED (No Evidence of Disease)—I was called a “survivor.”

Like many soon-to-be cancer patients, I felt confused and unsettled by that word. How could I be a survivor when I hadn’t even begun treatment, and when the outcome was far from certain?

Over the past 16 years of working with women coping with every form of cancer, I’ve learned one universal truth: cancer, and how we cope with it, is profoundly personal. Each of us brings our own life experiences, perspectives, and emotions to the table—and in turn, we shape our own cancer stories, with a narrative that feels true to us.

In our life story, words and phrases about cancer matter. A description that can feel empowering and affirming to one person can be regarded as minimizing to another. In the cancer lexicon, these words can either strengthen and heal—or diminish and disregard.

I asked our Cancer Be Glammed community to share their thoughts. Here’s what they said:

• Warrior / Battle / Fight – For some, these words are inspiring and motivating. For others, they feel exhausting or guilt-inducing, as though you must “fight harder” to survive, even when you’re already doing your best.
• “Lost the battle” – Many people strongly reject this phrase. To them, it implies that death is a personal failure—that if someone had just “fought harder,” they might still be alive. In truth, cancer biology and access to treatment—not willpower—determine outcomes.
• Brave / Inspiring – Always well-meant, but these words can feel like an unrealistic standard to live up to. Not everyone wants to be seen as a hero while navigating treatment.
• Cancer Journey – This phrase became popular because it offers a way to describe the long, unpredictable, and deeply personal experience of living with cancer. On the flip side, some people say that it is too soft, cliché, and doesn’t capture the real-life struggles of cancer.

A term that received the most positive reaction is the word Thriver. Here’s why:

Thriver shifts the focus away from cancer itself and onto living fully, embracing life in all its complexity—whether you are in treatment, living with metastatic disease, or navigating survivorship. For many, it captures resilience and action, without judgment or expectation.

In the one-size-doesn’t-fit-all world of treatment and recovery, each person must define their cancer experiences on their own terms. Respecting those choices is one of the most powerful ways to offer genuine support.

For more recovery and lifestyle support, explore our Know and Tell blog series.

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