After fully healing from surgery for tongue cancer and completing my Master’s Program, I was ready to begin dating again. It was time to have fun and figure out what I wanted in a relationship. Instead of getting a coffee or dinner, this is what I created for myself.

 1. Only agree to meet in a public place and be certain to tell a friend when, where, and with whom 
you are meeting.

2. Mutually agree in advance to meet for a 1-1.5-hour time limit. If you hit it off, plan a second date. If not, half an hour can be too long. Setting the time frame establishes limits and allows you to say thank you and leave as planned.

 3. Plan an activity to keep things casual – go for a walk, hit the driving range, embarrass yourself bowling, or attend a painting and sip class.

 4. It is up to you when you want to share your cancer story. If I wanted to see the person again, I responded, “I had tongue cancer and am now healthy.” If I had no interest in seeing the person again, I responded, “I’ll share more when I get to know you better.”

 5. Keep an open mind and heart! This period in your life provides a time to clarify and refine what qualities you like and dislike in a person. Have fun!

For more Lifestyle Advice and Recovery Tips read the blogs in our series “Know & Tell“.